A London lawyer runs a stop sign and gets pulled over by an Irish Garda.
He thinks that he is smarter than that Irish cop because he is a lawyer, from London, and is certain that he has a better education than any paddy cop.
He decides to prove this to himself and have some fun at the Garda’s expense.
The Irish Garda comes up to him and says,
“License and registration, please.”
London Lawyer replies, “What for?”
“You didn’t come to a complete stop at the Stop sign.”
“I slowed down, and no one was coming.”
“You still didn’t come to a complete stop. License And registration, please.”
“What’s the difference?”
“The difference is, you have to come to complete stop, that’s the law. License and registration, please!”
The London lawyer tries to outsmart the Garda:
“If you can show me the legal difference between “slow down” and “stop”, I’ll give you my license and registration and you give me the ticket. If not, you let me go and don’t give me the ticket.”
The Garda is resigned:
“Sounds fair. Please exit your vehicle, sir.”
The London lawyer exits his vehicle, but before he manages to say anything else, the Irish Garda takes out his baton and starts beating the lawyer with it and asks,
“Now do you want me to stop? Or just slow down?”
A man walks past a beggar every day and gives him $2, and that continues for a year.
Then, suddenly, the daily donation changes to $1.50.
“Well,” he thinks, “it’s always better than nothing.”
A year passes in this way until the man’s daily donation suddenly becomes $1.00.
“What’s going on now?” The beggar asks his donor.
“First you give me $2 every day, then $1.50, and now only $1, what’s the problem?”
“Well,” the man says, “my eldest son went to college last year. It’s very expensive so I had to cut the costs. This year, my eldest daughter also went to university, so I had to cut my expenses even further.”
“And how many children do you have?” Asks the beggar.
“Four,” the man replies.
“Well,” says the beggar, “I hope you don’t plan to educate them all at my expense.”
