An old lady went to a bank intending to withdraw money…
The old lady handed her bank card to a bank teller and said, “I would like to withdraw $500.”
The female teller told her, “For withdrawals less than $5,000, please use the ATM.”
The old lady then asked, “Why?” The teller irritably told her, “These are rules. Please leave if there is no other matter. There is a queue behind you.” She then returned the card to the old lady.
The old lady remained silent. But she returned the card to the teller and said, “Please help me withdraw all the money I have.”
The teller was astonished when she checked the account balance. She nodded her head, leaned down, and said to the old lady, “My apologies Granny, you have $3.5 million in your account and our bank does not have so much cash currently. Could you make an appointment and come again tomorrow?”
The old lady then asked, “How much am I able to withdraw now?”
The teller told her, “Any amount up to $300,000”
The old lady then told the teller that she wanted to withdraw $300,000 from her account.
The teller did so quickly and handed it to the old lady respectfully.
The old lady kept $500 in her bag and asked the teller to deposit the balance of $299,500 back into her account.
The moral of this tale…
Don’t be difficult with old people, they spent a lifetime learning the skills.
A priest and a taxi driver both passed away on the same day and found themselves at the gates of Heaven, where St. Peter was waiting for them.
“Please follow me,” St. Peter said to the taxi driver, waving his hand.
The taxi driver followed obediently, and soon St. Peter led him to a massive mansion. It had everything one could imagine: an indoor theater, a heated pool, and even a personal golf course!
“Wow, thank you!” said the taxi driver, astonished and pleased with his good fortune in the afterlife.
Then, St. Peter turned to the priest, who seemed anxious and excited to see where he’d land. St. Peter led him to a small, run-down cabin. Inside was a creaky bunk bed and an old black-and-white TV with spotty reception.
“Excuse me, but isn’t there a mistake?” asked the shocked priest. “I was a PRIEST. I devoted my life to serving the church and spreading God’s word.”
St. Peter nodded thoughtfully. “True, but during your sermons, people fell asleep. When the taxi driver drove, everyone prayed!”
